i’m pretty sure i’m having a quarterlife crisis.
so obviously – we’re going to need cocktails.
i hope one of you out there feels this way. just so i know i’m not crazy. and a little because, well, misery loves company.
my birthday is coming up, my second 25th. i know what you’re thinking – it’s not that old. and i know that too. ( if you were thinking that’s old, skip to the bottom of this post and please donate to my botox fund). it’s just when i moved here at 23 i had friends who were 26 and i remember thinking “by then, i’ll have things figured out.”
i’ll be taken. maybe thinking about kids in the next few years. i’ll have traveled so many more places. a corner office at work. living with a handsome man overlooking the city.
not a single one of those things has come true. not a single one of those is even on the horizon.
i know, life can change on a dime. enter: debbie downer. but it also might not. and i know the grass is always greener and one day i’ll be envious of this girl – the girl who could be selfish and spontaneous and live according to her own whims and rules.
but the unknown is scary. the independence is exhausting. the anxiety about what the future might not hold is terrifying.
every year on my birthday, i write a letter to myself – my future self really – recapping the previous year and what i hope for the next. so one day, i can pull them out, read them and just remember how it felt to be that 17 year old girl or 24 year old girl. hopefully, i’ll also laugh a little at myself and my future self’s heart will go out to the uptight, scared almost 26 year old me because she doesn’t know what happiness is yet to come.
24 was a little rough. there were a couple of things 24 brought that still make my heart drop.
but no breaking news here people. just your old regular programming. same apartment, same job, same relationship status as i had at this exact same time last year.
please someone tell me they have felt this way, or do feel this way.
part of me wants to continue this pity party, drink a bottle of wine and ask friends for donations to my botox fund. make an appt for “gray coverage“. maybe buy a cat.
but well, i hate cats. and i’m nearly out of wine (911!!). so i’m stuck. so i call my best friend kelby, who is actually a life coach (kelbynicolecoaching.com, check her out) and the person i refer to as ‘sunshine’ because she is literally just full of love. i hope, for their sake, that every megan has a kelby. and she reminded me of who i am – and that this is my life. and that maybe i just need to stop doing things just because people think it’s what i should do. because, that’s what’s really draining.
and then i got to thinking about sassy eats, this little happy place. i didn’t really tell anyone i was doing it. i just did it. i couldn’t stop it really. i craved an outlet. had a hankering for something that was mine. something that wouldn’t be reviewed and edited and come back red with tracked changes. a place where i could share my loves – in my kitchen and in my life.
so thank you. thinking of you reading this reminds me i’m on the right path. i’m doing me. i did something i was afraid to do. i trusted my gut and and started this place. and my heart is happier because of it. so my birthday wish is – let 26 bring more of this.
(below picture is simply grapefruit, others are ruby red grapefruit)
and you know what? how exciting it is that i still get to fall in love again. have first kiss butterflies. that i have a niece to love on until one day i hopefully have my own. and maybe i dont have a corner office, but i have the best podmates and huge windows 23 floors up overlooking the best city in america.
and that ain’t bad. that ain’t bad at all.
so now that you’ve helped me solve my quarterlife crisis, i’m off to throw myself a birthday eve party to celebrate how gosh darn lucky i am. enter: cocktails and brie.
p.s. you are fabulous. and if ever you forget, let me know and i’ll remind you.
- 2 cup fresh ruby red grapefruit (one picture shows it with simply grapefruit)
- juice of 1 1/2 limes
- 1 cup tequila
- 1/4 cup grand mariner
- 2 tbl agave nectar
- 1/2 cup ice
- add all of above ingredients.
- in a food processor add ice and ingredients. pulse until well combined.
- add to sugar or salted rim glass, optional.